Why the "Hey Girl!" dm's made me hide my business

If you’re on Facebook or Instagram, chances are you’ve been dm’d by a complete stranger asking you to look at their network marketing business. It may have looked something like this.

“Hey girl! Love what you’re doing! You’d be great at what I do!”


“I see you’re into health and fitness. Here’s my 36 page DNA report. Take a look at it and tell me what you think!”


“I like you’re page…let’s get on a phone call”

DM #1.jpg

Can you relate, or am I the only one? Here’s why I became a target for women looking to recruit into their business. I’m a health coach and a self-development junkie, and it shows in all of my social media posts. What you won’t see often is me promoting my company, or it’s products directly. In the network marketing world, I would be considered a great prospect. I mean, why wouldn’t a fit, professional, positive momma want to join a company that promotes and supports health and wellness?

Here’s the problem, and the very thing that made me hide the products I deeply believed in. Two likes on a post, followed by two comments does not constitute relationship building!! Asking someone to do work when you’ve not even asked them any questions about them, their life, or their big goal is forceful and impersonal and ladies, and it’s a complete turn off. I have asked specific questions about products I’ve been presented and hear crickets. If someone asks genuine questions about your product, ANSWER THEM!

Whether you’re WHY is to simply make some extra money to pay for your kid’s hockey, or maybe your dream is to quit your corporate job, building a business takes time, consistency, and requires you to build relationships. I know it’s scary to put yourself out there, unsure of what to say, how to say it, and what to do if you get questions you don’t know the answer to, but just do your best and if you don’t know, find out.

The more I got these types of messages, the more I hid my own company in the closet. Each time I got a new friend request, I was waiting for it. Deep down, I never wanted to make other women feel the way I was feeling. I never wanted them to feel used, liked briefly, and set aside when it seemed too hard. I didn’t want to play games, or feel like I was back in high school again, trying to fit in.

The ironic thing about it all, is that I’ve met a lot of incredible women in the on-line space and we’ve cultivated deep and inspirational bonds with each other that I couldn’t find with most women I met in person. The woman that enrolled me approached me through Instagram, and I absolutely loved her energy, her vibe, and everything she stood for! So the fact that it WAS possible kept a sparkle of hope within me, but the fear of being like “them” kept me quiet.

I’m certainly not an expert, and am still finding my way, but here’s what I do know about this business:

  1. You need to believe in the products. If you don’t eat them, put them on your body, or in your home, you aren’t going to “sell” others on them either.

  2. You need to resonate with the team.

  3. You need to build and foster relationships even if it takes months, or years.

  4. You need to find “your own voice”. You’ll be provided scripts and dm prompts which are helpful, but you need to make them your own.

  5. You need to stop being creepy….like, really. You need to just stop it.

  6. Give value to others. Find ways to support and encourage them without the expectation of something in return.

  7. The compensation plan needs to be easy to understand and even easier to explain.

  8. The cost of entry is extremely affordable if entrepreneurship is your goal.

  9. You don’t need to quit your day job to make it work.

I’ve questioned myself and my company more times than I can think of and I keep coming back to these main points:

  • I resonated with the company’s vision and mission from day #1.

  • I am inspired by my mentor/leader/up-line.

  • I use the products every single day and so does my family.

  • No product is going to replace exercise, healthy food habits, and having a positive mindset.

  • Pyramid schemes are illegal. Network marketing companies aren’t.

  • NWM is not a get rich quick opportunity. It’s actually a business and it takes time and effort to grow.

  • Putting yourself out there is scary, but there is a reward at the end if you’re willing to push past comfort.

My intention isn’t to bash these women who’ve approached me in the past. I get it! It’s not easy starting a new business and trying to build a team. It’s uncomfortable and often times really scary. We all want to be accepted, and rejection is hard BUT I believe it is possible to build your dream business and hang with inspiring boss babes BUT do it in a way that feels authentic and true to you.

Have you had a similar experience? If so I’d love to hear from you.

xo Tarrah

Ready to learn more about how to unlock the power of food to heal your body, heal your hormones and feel the best you’ve ever felt? If you want to have an in-depth conversation about the ways I can help you support you with your hormone, or health challenges so you can feel more in control of what’s happening in your body,  book a free 30 minute health history with me by clicking this link